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Late Night Falls off Curbs

Updated: Mar 24, 2020

That photo, is literally, how my sister Sue fell. This is a short story about how we can’t do anything without injury.

My sister is not my sister, lets start here. We’ve been best friends since the dawn of time. Our families, lives and everything are intertwined. Her children are my nephews and my step-daughter is her niece. Now she is always my neighbour and the reason I wanted this house. It is will be this way until the end of time. She’s always been my sister and always will be.

That does not, however, stop her from being a klutz.

It wasn’t late last night, but it was dark. Not pitch black, about 9:45PM. My anxiety does not let me go into shops alone. No matter the size of the shop, I can’t get over it and I get anxiety that an panic attack is inevitable. It is also inconvenient. Last night I ran out of pods for my vape. I wouldn’t make a night but I couldn’t go out. Sue said she would come with me. Mistake number one.

We made it to the shop, despite really pushing our luck with the amount of petrol in the car. Went inside, I was getting my pods and Sue was getting some tasty snacks for the kids (and herself to hide at mine, because you’re still on a diet if the bad stuff isn’t in your house). Bought what we needed to and left. This is where I don’t understand what happened next.

All I heard was slipping and skidding I turned around and there Sue was, face down on the pavement kinda jiggling. Was she dead? Was her face horribly mangled? Had she broken bones? It was the longest 2 seconds of my life as I was trying to decide whether to laugh or rush to help. Luckily, she turned onto her back and her face was not mangled. She was alive! And I could laugh.

It wasn’t until we were forced to stop for petrol till we saw the damage under the fluorescent lights of Esso. That bitch was swelling and bleeding. One tiny trip out, one sister helping another just go to the shop, and I had gifted her… this:

Don’t worry, it’s not broken. It’s just unfortunately hilarious.

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